Teeny tiny

I'm so glad my new scales measure in quarters of a pound as I've lost the princely sum of a 0.25lb this week. And I'm actually quite relieved. After two weeks of 5lb losses I expected to stay the same or even put on weight but thankfully I've lost a tiny bit which, considering the week I've had, is quite remarkable. The puddings finally got me. It was the last week I'll be getting free food at work as this week we aren't in studio and my contract is up on Friday (aaargh!!) so I decided to make the most of it and overindulged rather a lot. I had chocolate brownie with raspberries, trifle, chocolate tart and two helpings of tarte tatin, squeezed together in the same bowl and hidden by a swathe of cream to disguise the fact that I was being a pig. So it wouldn't have surprised me if I'd put on a pound or two, especially as I've also had fish and chips twice this week. But I didn't and now I have to be really good and aim to lose my regulation 2lb next week, before we go to Devon.

I suppose it's my chance to be really strict and hopefully lose a decent amount of weight before the holiday. Plus, Jim's mum and dad are coming to stay pre-Devon and we'll be having fish and chips one night and going out for dinner the next. Then five days at a windswept farmhouse near Dartmouth with far too much opportunity for troughing and no food diary to fill in. If I can escape with maintaining I'll be overjoyed. I'll have to be strict and abstain from too much booze as it's far too easy to have six or seven drinks when you're in company and that would be hundreds of calories, if not thousands (if I had beer rather than wine or gin). Plus, the food isn't really within my control and that's always a minefield. I might take my blender so I can stil have smoothies for breakfast or I might just have fruity porridge or spelt muesli. That might be easier. As long as I don't start having bacon and eggs every day. With buttered toast. And sausages. Mmmmmm!! Bad girl, naughty girl!

I'm going to be quite stressed as well as my job comes to an end on Friday and I haven't got anything lined up so I'll be poor and unemployed and in the house all day. I just have to stay away from the fridge and not go to Sainsbury's for bread and cakes to pass the time and ease the stress and boredom. I might have to get a Christmas job to pay the rent but I don't fancy working weekends as I won't get to see Jim. Plus, my parents are coming down on 7th December to bring all the Christmas pressies so I have to be around then. I'll see. I'm hoping Endemol will keep me on for another couple of weeks at least (obviously while letting me go to Devon for a few days) which will ease the financial strain and give me more time to get a job. Why are there no TV jobs in Bristol at the moment?! I don't want to go on Jobseekers Allowance as the people at the Job Centre always make you feel like a total loser. Grrr, why does life have to be so awkward?

And my achilles tendons are giving me gyp again so I can't walk very well. I need to get them better so I can go for walks when I'm out of work to keep me occupied and burn some more calories. It would be an ideal time to join the gym but, with having no work, I can't afford it. Catch 22 - if I have the time I don't have the money and if I have the money I don't have the time. Why can't there be a special gym and pool for fat people where you can exercise free of charge? It could be funded by the NHS to combat the rising costs of obesity. Of course, I'd want it to be fairly luxurious and not council-y at all. It would need nice changing rooms and hairdryers and stuff and lots of machines and a sauna and jacuzzi. And plenty of aqua aerobics classes at reasonable hours. And it would have to be situated at the end of my street so I would have no excuse not to use it. Mind you, the gym in Newcastle was at the end of the street and I still didn't go. I'm such a lazy tart. On which note, I'm going for a lie down and a cup of tea. It is Sunday after all.