Oh dear!

I've just had pizza for lunch. Not just any pizza either. Domino's aka the lardiest thing you can imagine. Half Pepperoni Passion and half Full House - at least I only ordered a small! I'm in a fat/miserable/rebellious mood today and didn't want to be good and have my soup for lunch and decided, as it was raining and the five-minute walk to the supermarket was just too taxing, I'd order in a slab of naughty. But boy was it good! I hope it doesn't rekindle my nascent interest in takeaway pizza and that I can move away from the craving with my dignity and weight intact. Not that my weight is anything to shout about. I'm not updating it as today isn't the official weigh-in but I'm 2.25lb up on last week. I've been a little naughty - the pizza, fish and chips and some toast and butter last night - but not enough to have actually gained weight. Or so I thought. Perhaps my body is adjusting to having lost 7lb last week? I don't know. All I know is, when I stepped on the scales this morning, I was heavier. And I feel fat. Obviously I know that I am still morbidly obese but I've been feeling thinner. Until today.

And I've been having a grumpy week all round. The whole job thing has got me down and I've been a bit weepy and glum. And it's been raining all week so I haven't had a chance to go for any walks so I've been cooped up in the house with only my beloved Frank for company (and he's not the world's most talkative cat). I want the new Rosemary Conley workout DVD with Coleen Nolan but Jim said I have to wait until he gets paid as we have no money for extras so I felt even more guilty about being out of work. I'm going to go to some temp agencies on Monday to try and get a temp job to pay the bills for a while. It's not ideal but we need the money and I have to get out of the house before I go completely spare. I hope I get something local that's reasonably well-paid (for temping anyway) working with nice people. I'll probably get a dull data entry job in the back of beyond in a company staffed by Nazis, knowing my luck. Ooh, I'm having my own little pity party today, aren't I?!

On the upside, I fitted into my boots. And, for the first time ever, Jim didn't have to help me do them up. Even when I first bought them, he had to hold the two sides together while I zipped them up and the last time I wore them, he actually cut himself on the zip as they were so tight. So I have to buy some Veet or shave my legs as they're a bit Gorillas in the Mist at the mo. I also tried on some size 22 trousers (admittedly elasticated) that have never really fitted me and they fit easily and the Etam jeans are almost there. And some tops that were either too tight or rode up too much because of the size of my chest now look quite good. Well, as good as they can look on a fatso. And if I carry on eating pizza they'll soon be too small again. I'm going to be good again from tomorrow in the hope that I can end this mini blip. In the meantime, I might just eat some grapes without weighing them. Now that's bad behaviour!!